I've been reading a few blogs where people are talking about personal guilt, and how difficult it is to cope with. Most often this guilt is about a decision they made in the past; to return to work while their child is still young for example, or taking personal time for themselves away from their loved ones; choosing a school which turned out the wrong one for their child; paying for a family holiday and then being made redundant and so forth.
I just don't understand this particular sort of guilt thing at all. If we're rational people - and most of us are as rational as we can be - then we weigh up pros and cons and make what we believe to be the best decision possible at that time and in those circumstances. That's what I try to do.
Having said that, like everyone else sometimes my decisions are influenced by my emotions but emotions don't rule my decisions, they're just another factor to weigh up.
Of course sometimes we find that the results of our decisions don't turn out as we'd believed and hoped they would when we made them. That may be cause for regret, but guilt should only apply when we've knowingly at the time made a poor decision which has had a bad effect on others as we knew from the start that it would. Now that's cause for guilt.
Not addressing (where possible) the bad effects on others of decisions we've made, there's another genuine cause for guilt.
Not knowing what the future will bring, and how that may reflect on past choices is what we get for not being omniscient. To err is human, to suffer guilt over being human is dumb. :O))
3 comments:
Yes all good common sense ,loved your final misquote...........Jan xx
I have few regrets about decisions made - but guilt over decisions? NO!
Of course there was this one time with the bishop and the actress............
I think for some emotions do rule decisions, the regret being not being strong enough to not feel, but I get what you mean and I like how you've put it. Rache
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