Sunday, 17 December 2006
Thursday, 14 December 2006
Your 'Do You Want the Terrorists to Win' Score: 94%
You are a terrorist-loving, Bush-bashing, "blame America first"-crowd traitor. You are in league with evil-doers who hate our freedoms. By all counts you are a liberal, and as such clearly desire the terrorists to succeed and impose their harsh theocratic restrictions on us all. You are fit to be hung for treason! Luckily George Bush is tapping your internet connection and is now aware of your thought-crime. Have a nice day.... in Guantanamo!
Oh woe, woe, woe is me. I expected 100%!
Take the test and see if you do better :O)
Wednesday, 13 December 2006
I wood like a cool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer
yer Frend, BiLLy
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do?
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who nags him constantly? It's time to give up that dream.
I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba.
Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're gay. I'll set you up with a Barbie.
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.
Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of Scotch.
What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?
Your friend, Thomas
All the toys are made in China . I have a condo in Miami , where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. Hey, you wanted to know.
Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?
Are you really that gullible or are you just a blonde? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house.
I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one?
That whiney begging shite may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again.
We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our home?
Monday, 11 December 2006
Sunday, 10 December 2006
Friday, 8 December 2006
My eBay expertise grows apace. I have two Georgian doll's houses, altho I only wanted one I couldn't resist putting a bid on two. Imagine my joy at finding I'd got both. I also possess - and am doomed to keep - an obviously much loved toy farm, with buildings and animals so battered that they look as if they belong on a distant and poverty stricken tornado devastated Welsh hillside.
I'm getting good at this!
My husband meanwhile is bidding thousands for vintage guitars. And he's found the password to my Paypal account. I have a horrid feeling that joining eBay could turn out to be a disastrous move.
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens . . .
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.